Leave something behind

I cannot see it, but I know you will
That those words you heard are what should have been free
Love however costs more than a bet
For I cannot read what I know didn't write

I cannot see it, but I know you will
That I was just trying to leave something behind
Maybe in this world there's too much leftovers
Too many things to pick up for those left behind

I cannot see it, but I know you will
That the struggling pickers are always the victims
How come the lefters are always ahead?
Where else could I go where there's no picking?

I cannot see it, but I know you will
That you called me to your house and I left something behind
Even the books you hid that were written in tears
Books you made me read at the end of your fears

I cannot see it, but I know you will
That in this world of the fallen we too are left behind
To be picked up by strangers in whose arms we now hide
Hoping that we too will leave something behind
For that one picker who we know will not leave

* * *
For you who has things to be picked up
Inspired by the track 'To leave something behind' by S. Rowe
Dec 30th 2016
Nairobi

Love to call

You cannot call to love,
You must love to call

You cannot stick to love,
You must love to stick

You cannot give to love,
You must love to give

You cannot sing to love,
You must love to sing

You cannot visit to love,
You must love to visit

You cannot reply to love,
You must love to reply

Patiently, consistently, keenly
lovingly

* * *
The bed of sorrows, drifting without sugar
Nairobi August, 2016

These People

But these people
They keep on saying they can't have no more
But here they are
Hungry vegetarians staying up till four

How else should we judge them
If the prosecutor is among them
Crazy party animals
3am and they still dress up to come

They strive to belong
I know I shouldn't have trusted them
But now I agree
Friends are the ones whom you meet and rejoice

***
July 2016, Skyfall Buruburu, Nairobi

She responds to my texts

She's the only one who responds to my texts
Cold of July I wish she wasn't with her
ex

Now that am in need
I take time to
reflect

So many nights spent
Agonizing with
rejects

How is a man in heaven
Without his
Head

Hearts are so bitter
It takes time to be
felt

In debts so heavy
I wish she could bring some
Bread

Now my heart is still bleeding
I mourn a dear
friend

Good luck Steve
I hope you find
Rest

For life takes so much from the living
The dead should never
regret

Even if she is the only one
Who responds to my
Texts

* * *
Rest in Peace Steve Kibare, the lone sentinel, a good companion and a man full of insights

Kariokor Cemetery, 10th July 2016

He Wore a Concrete Mask

He wore a concrete mask
Spread himself so thin and wide
most thought it was
a fad

Spared the visit to the abortionist
clinic
who said we wont
retract

Now he's left to wonder back
to the breasts that made him crack
Annoying as it sounds he still believes
that hope is the other side of chance

Young men will never realise her needs
They rove and romp to thrill
As pain continues to bring her back
Wish she could sound the crack

Fear makes him take her back
she moans but still she pawns
She's knows he's sure, she knows he'll come
sand has mixed with sand

Hope is a monster nurtured through tears
that faith will never take back
Its time to remove the concrete veil
and bury the furrows she bagged

The sun will shine to mock her back

You know its them I cant trust

* * *
May 2016
Hacienda

My two christines

I've got two christines in my back pocket
One should be my woman and the other my mama
I dare not escape from my own wisdom
Tales women tell when a man gives up

I've found two christines in forbidden places
One is a breeder and the other is a keeper
Farmers have patience when dry seeds crack
Thoughts fathers sell when their time is up

I've seen two christines in crowded spaces
One places bets for the other to comply
Tell her that am lost in thoughts and translations
The book of Solomon gives enough material

I've kept two christines in hidden forests
One crawls down under and the other soars above
Pain should yield fabricated enchantments
A bird in hand no longer ruffles but squeaks

I'll leave two christines in suspended vases
Yes they may be options but its still left to chance
Struggles it seems are a pathway to honesty
Set them free, for the tournament is over

I've got two christines in my back pocket

* * * 
January 2016
Machakos County